Today, hubby and I took the kids on a little drive to my OB appointment, and on the way, Aaron (3 3/4yrs)  looking at the sidewalk next to the van gasps loudly and exclaims, “Mom! Look! Humans!!!”

My appointment went well, I am 29 weeks along and little Isaiah, a.k.a Izzy, is doing great.  I’m a little anemic, so I need to eat more leafy greens.  I’m already looking forward to being done with this pregnancy and holding little Izzy in my arms.  I’m also looking forward to having the option to put him down when I want to. He’s getting really heavy and my back’s been complaining.

Hi Friends,

Would you all mind saying a prayer for Gabe this Monday (well, you don’t need to wait until Monday to pray =)? He has another EEG. It’s just a routine follow-up to last year’s EEG, which of course showed abnormal activity on the right side of his brain (causing the seizure activity).  I have reason to believe that he has been having “silent seizures”.  Maybe this EEG will tell whether he is or not. I’m not sure.

So, Sunday night, we’ll be keeping our sweet 4 3/4 yr old up until midnight, then waking him up at 4am, and keeping him awake until his EEG at 2pm, at which time he’s supposed to take an hour long nap on an uncomfortable bed in an unfamiliar place for the  EEG technician.  Keep in mind that this sweet boy does NOT take naps. He has maybe fallen asleep during nap time all of about 5 times in the last year and 1/2.  But he needs to be asleep for the EEG, and he needs to STAY asleep for an hour. So, prayers are truly appreciated. Please pray that Gabe will fall asleep at the appropriate time, and that he will stay asleep for the length of time needed.

Please pray for me also, because I will be getting as little sleep as Gabriel, and being very pregnant I need my rest =) I will be driving to San Diego (almost an hour commute) while tired. Pray that I will not be irritable with others, and that I will have the energy to drive safely and function well as a wife and mommy.

A few days ago, Josh was wrestling with the kids. He was lying on the couch and Gabe, Aaron and Emmie were all piled up on top of him. It was so fun to watch! Then, Gabe excitedly exclaims, “Daddy! There’s not enough kids on you!”

So I asked Gabe, ” Should Mommy have more babies so more kids can wrestle daddy?”

He grins and says matter-of-factly, “Yes.”

Two days ago, seven years ago, Josh asked me to be his girlfriend. We had been friends for about 9 months. That Sunday morning, he came to my church with me and then came to my family’s house for the afternoon. He asked my dad if he could talk with him. I’m sure my dad knew what was up because he said, “Let’s take a drive.”

They were gone for over an hour, and when they came back my dad came in and asked my mom, “Deb, where’s my shotgun?”  I laughed, because that’s just my dad’s sort of humor. I knew things had gone well.  Josh came into the kitchen where I was washing dishes and officially asked me to be his girlfriend.  Of course I said yes =)

Emmie: “Guess what?”

Mommy: “What?”

Emmie: “I say ‘guess what’.” 

Because of the recent rains, we’ve have a few snails crawling around the driveway.

Well, yesterday, the snails were all gone. I was getting Gabe (4 1/2) off his school bus and he asked, “Where are the snails?” I said, “They’re all gone.” He asked, “Did the French people eat them all?”

 The day before, Gabe asked me, “Are you a French people?” I replied, “No, I’m not a French person, I am an American.” He asked, “So, you don’t eat snails?”

I’m tagging myself for a meme because I need a break from housework and all the kids are napping =)

1. What time did you get up this morning? 7:10am

2.Diamonds or pearls? Diamonds 

3. What was the last film you saw at the cinema? Atonement- last Friday

4. What is your favorite TV show? Anything on Home and Garden channel

5 What do you usually have for breakfast? Zofran (anti-nausea meds) usually with Mountain Dew.

6. What is your middle name? Christine

7. What food do you dislike? Almost all seafood

8. What is your favorite CD at moment? Matisyahu 

9. What kind of car do you drive? Plymouth Grand Voyager

11. What characteristic do you despise? Pride. Especially when I see it in myself.

12. Favorite item of clothing? My beloved Flip Flops! Hubby will attest to the fact that I even wear them when it’s raining.

13. If you could go anywhere in the world on vacation where would you go? Venice

14. Favorite brand of clothing? Motherhood Maternity

15. Where would you retire to? Mommies don’t retire, they just have their job title changed to Grandma. But I want to stay right here in San Diego for the rest of my life.

16. What was your most recent memorable birthday? My 12 yr Birthday. I had a party!

17. Favorite sport to watch? Beach Volleyball, or Basketball

18. Are you a morning person or a night person? No.

19. What is your shoe size? 7ish

20. Pets? Cat named Bunyan (after John Bunyan) aka Bunny, Buns, Bun-Buns, Cat, Hey You.

21. Exciting news you’d like to share with us? I haven’t hurled today yet.

22. What did you want to be when you were little? A music producer, ok, well I wasn’t that little. At least that was my career of choice in college.

23. What is your favorite candy? Nerds Ropes

24. What is your favorite flower? Carnations.

25. What is a day on the calendar you are looking forward to? My Bday

26. What are you listening to right now? The oh so peaceful quiet hum of our computor.

27. What was the last thing you ate? Turkey and sweet pickle sandwich with baby carrots and pringles.

28. Do you wish on stars? No. I find that praying to a sovereign God is much more effective =)

29. If you were a crayon, what color would you be? That depends entirely upon whether I could come out of clothes after being put into the dryer.

30. How is the weather right now? Sunny and beautiful

31. Last person you spoke to on the phone? My sweet hubby.

32. Your favorite soft drink? Right now, Mountain Dew.

33. Favorite restaurant? Tie between Natiya’s Thai and Passage to India.

34. Hair color? The top foot is dark brown, bottom 8ish inches are light brown with blonde highlights (been growing my hair out from my last color job)

35. Your favorite toy as a child? Night Bright (well it was actually my cousins toy) and my Glow Worm.

36. Summer or Winter? Summer, because no one thinks I’m wierd for wearing my flip flops everyday.

37. Hugs or kisses? Hugs

38. Chocolate or Vanilla? Depends on whether or not I’m pregnant.

39. Coffee or tea? Hot:tea, Iced:coffee

40. What is under your bed? An ironing board and probably a few of the kids toys.

41. What did you do last night? hurled

42. What are you afraid of? snakes and dentists

43. Salty or sweet? depends on the status of my morning sickness

44. How many keys on your keyring? 5

45. How many years at your current job? 5 1/2, but our anniversary will make it 6 years.

46. Favorite day of the week? The Lord’s Day

47. How many towns have you lived in? 5

48. Do you make friends easily? No. But I do find it easy to get along well with others.

49. Do you play a musical instrument? Piano for most of my life, guitar since mid high school, and violin since about 2 years ago.  Disclaimer: To play an instrument does not imply one has any skill.

50. Who will you tag? Kimm , Maggie, Steph and April.  Ladies, do not feel obligated if you are busy =)

I know that among the readers of my blog, there are several of you who love children and desire to raise many of them.  I hope what I am about to share encourages you, and uplifts your hearts.

I am not usually this upfront about my feelings, I do tend to wear a mask when I am feeling down or depressed.  I pray that the Lord will give me the transparency  needed to have true fellowship with my family in Christ.

I had been very depressed since Thanksgiving evening. I was depressed until this morning.  So, for those of you at church who asked how I was doing yesterday, I am sorry for not being more honest in my answers.

On Thanksgiving evening we had a family dinner at a relative’s house, a handful of family members were present.  One in particular who loves me very much, yet disagrees that we are being responsible in having many kids, makes sure to tell me every time I see her, in one way or another, that she would like us not to have anymore.  I only see this loved one 1-2 times a year.  And she always says something to try to discourage me from conceiving again.

I know myself and my desires. I know that God has woven into the very fabric of my being, the desire to have many children. I know God has given me the ability to love in a capacity that would make me feel less than complete if I gave up the chance to bear the blessings God has brought my way.  I know that aside from being a wife to my sweetheart, my greatest earthly joy comes from being a mother.  I know that my very soul cries out to carry a child within me.  Some women want to be doctors or ballerinas. I want to be a wife and a mommy. I have no other earthly aspirations. I want to raise many mighty warriors for the kingdom of God.  

So, when said person tells me that I should have no more kids, I feel like she is rejecting the very core of who I am. I feel like since I have rejected her advice year after year, she is gravely disappointed in me and all I have become. I love this person so very much, and had been feeling very hurt by her comments. I had it in my mind to conceive just to spite her, which of course is an evil thought, and very unfair for the child who would come of it, as well as my husband.  Then I had almost decided that if she didn’t want me to have more children, I just wouldn’t tell her whenever I did have more.  This of course would have hurt her deeply, because she does love our current children very much and would want to know if there were more family members to love.

As you can probably tell, I had been having a rather fleshly weekend.  I’d cried a lot, because I knew I was in the flesh, yet I was feeling so hurt, that I felt helpless to change my attitude.  

This loved one who always discourages me does so because she loves me.  She did not have a good Christian home, or marriage. She does not understand that my worldview is so different from hers.  She thinks her advise is wise, and because she loves me, she gives it every time I see her.

I spoke to my Dad about it this morning.  He assured me that this relative only comments because she loves me very much.  I think he gave me some of the best advice ever. This is the part I want to share with you other mommies.

“If you are strong enough to raise many children for thirty plus years, then little comments like those from ——–, should be like little drops in a bucket in comparison. You are strong enough to not let the comments get to you.”

I was feeling so down from hurtful comments, that I had forgotten that God has given me strength to raise my family. And it takes much more strength to raise many kids than to not be hurt by yearly handfuls of comments from someone I rarely see.

My Dad also told me that if someone is easily offended and overly sensitive, then in a job like raising a large family, they will feel overworked, depressed, and sometimes close to insanity, because someone who is easily offended, cannot possibly do such a huge job as raising a large family.

I have in the past felt very overworked, very depressed and yes, even very insane. I guess this means I need to develop thicker skin.

So, I guess I just wanted to share with you all what has been such an encouragement to me today and hopefully many years to come. If God has placed within your heart the desire to have a large family, then he has given you the strength needed to accomplish it.  You may not always feel strong,  in fact, I, myself, rarely feel strong. But we have divine strength, and we really don’t need to sweat the little stuff.  God is here, he is our God, he is our strength.

Have a blessed week raising your little signs of God’s favor.

Yesterday I asked Gabe to put his shoes away,  he obeyed and I said,  “Thank you, Handsome.”

 He said, “You’re welcome, my lady. Mommy you’re the best lady I’ve ever seen. I’m very happy to see you.”

And of course, my heart melted right on cue.

I don’t know how many of you have had nitrous (laughing gas) before. But that stuff is crazy.

Friday I had four impacted partial-boney wisdom teeth surgically removed.  They gave me nitrous as well as locals. They let me numb up, then went to work. I closed my eyes and tried not to think about what was happening. I am phobic of dentists and all the pain they represent, so of course sitting with my mouth open at the hands of an oral surgeon was a bit stomach turning for me.

With my eyes closed, I started to believe I was sleeping, but then I would open my eyes, and realize I really was awake. I felt like I was in a dreamworld. I couldn’t quite put my finger on what reality was and why I was sleeping in a strange chair. Then the surgeon started talking, I think, Who is he talking to? “Ok, your going to feel some pushing”…Pushing?…”Ok, almost.”…Am I pushing?…“Ok, It’s out.”…What!!??, How did I have a baby!? I don’t think I was pregnant. Did I just have a baby?What’s going on???

For the next five minute I sat there trying to wake up mentally and figure out what in the world was going on. Oh, yeah, I’m getting my wisdom teeth out. I feel silly. I open my eyes again to see if I am indeed still under a bright light with a guys hands in my mouth. Yes. Ok, just close your eyes again, relax, you’ll be done soon then you can go home and take a nap…take a nap…nap. Surgeon starts talking again, “Turn your head to the left a bit, keep your mouth open.” Who is he talking to? “A little more to the left, ok, now close your mouth just a little.” Is he talking to me? Doesn’t he know I’m asleep? “Open wide.” I’m asleep. Why is he talking to me. I wish he would just let me rest.

Finally, he finished all four teeth, put gauze in my mouth to bite on and switched the nitrous to oxygen to bring me back out of my dreamworld. I had a nice visit while I was there though. I told Josh I wish I could bring some nitrous home with me, he said, “No, that would be an abuse of it.” Yeah, I guess he’s right.

So, now I’m recovering. I’m on bedrest for a few days. Despite all the ice I kept on my face, it still got all swollen. I look like shrek, except not green =) or maybe a really big chipmunk. I’ve been sleeping a lot. The pain meds keep me sleepy, so I’m trying to stay away from the stairs as much as I can.

But praise God that the surgery went smoothly. It only took about 45mins. I feel the pain easing up little by little. I know a lot of people were praying for me.  If you were one of them, thanks!